Provision and Trust

Wow, is all I have to say tonight. The buyer of our car came and gave us the money tonight. He was supposed to have shown up yesterday and didn't make it for some reason. I'm not sure why. All I know is that this month's mortgage payment is sitting on the nightstand. Tomorrow on the way to work, Hubbs is dropping it off. The last few weeks at work have been kind of skimpy in the hours scheduled department. Hate retail post holiday season, especially hourly retail....anyway, I was talking to God quite a bit over the past week and a half about the fact that the mortgage payment was going to be way late this month as we had a very high natural gas bill to get paid, how I was counting down the night time diapers and as of tonight was going to use the last one, how we could use a few grocery items, the car needed some gas to get through this cold snap, how Hubbs really could use some new work clothes, the girls need new toothbrushes and we could use a few more things like body wash and toilet paper.

To start, Hubbs filed our taxes today. God is soooo good. Our taxes this year are paying his mom back for our furnace, they are totally clearing the credit card debt that ensued while I was pregnant with our Beans and dealing with a way to make the deductible where Hubbs used to work (let's just say it was a very high deductible), and the entire remainder of the loan on the car. We are also going to be able to replace the windshield on the car (it is cracked through thanks to a stray rock on the way back from my MIL's two trips ago), the muffler that is very holey and new tires (we have bald spots on the rear tires, yes, I know, not good) and possibly new shocks....there will be some left over from that, and it should pay off most if not possibly all of the Bugs. We are still paying her birth off due to bad insurance....ok, not bad, just not the greatest, a high deductible and then wouldn't cover things most other insurances typically do (and the fact that she was kept in the hospital two extra days due to the Hep. B vaccine and an over zealous pediatrician that was on call the weekend we had her). Then, we can resume paying on my student loans when those come out of forbearance in a few months and then if things work out the way we have planned, they will be nearly gone after tax season next year and hopefully we will have most of what we will need to pay cash for a used mini van saved up. Oh happy day.

Then, while I was laying down (I was sick most of the day, glad today was Hubb's day off, he gave me this lovely weird head cold thingy) there was a knock on the door. It was the guy who wanted to buy our car. He came to finalize the deal and apologize for not coming yesterday. I was laying down having a quite the discussion with God.

Me: Uh, God, you know the mortgage isn't paid this month (thankfully they don't get cranky about that until the tenth), we are going to need toilet paper this week, Hubbs doesn't have any body wash left, and we use our last diaper tonight on the Beans, and I don't think she is ready to go in panties overnight. Naps, we've gotten down, overnight, not yet.

God: Trust ME. It is going to be fine.

Me: I know it is going to be fine. You are in control. I know that we aren't going to be in this financial boat forever. I know You are going to get us out, I've known that for a long while. Which, if You could also just please tell me what we are to do in the line of Hubb's employment, you know, direction as to what to pursue, and How in the world am I going to get diapers tomorrow?

God: Be patient. Trust ME. I WILL PROVIDE.

During me pestering God about providing for us and me saying I really didn't see how it was going to work out this week, the buyer of the car knocked on the door. Man, I felt bad. I really was having trust issues. Still do to an extent. However, the timing of it all couldn't have been planned by a human.

I'm still blown away. God has this way of answering our prayers and providing for our needs at the best time for us. Even if we think it isn't the best time. Even when in our opinion He waits too long and we think causes us undue stress. Yet, His timing is perfect. It always has been, is now, and always will be.

Oh, and we did get diapers tonight.

Goodbye Old Car

Well, we finally sold the white car this morning. This was so providential. This money is making the mortgage payment this month. Due to a very high gas bill this last month, I was starting to get a tad bit worried about this month. Yet, I kept feeling God tell me that it is ok, He's got it covered. This morning, there was a knock on the door and a guy there asking if we wanted to sell it (less than we originally were wanting, but still nothing to sneeze at) because he needed the engine out of it. So, he is bringing us the money tomorrow and taking the car. I cleaned it out this morning after that. We had some stuff left in it from when we used to drive it. It is kind of sad, getting rid of it. That is the car that we brought the eldest home from the hospital in. It is the car in which my husband proposed to me. Yes, he proposed to me in the car. I had come to visit him while he was at school one weekend, and we had then gone to church that Sunday. There I had seen so many friends of mine that kept asking if Hubbs had finally (we had only been courting two years at that point) asked me to marry him. I kept telling them not yet. So, after church was over, we were in the car in the parking lot about to get ready to go to a friend's mom's house for lunch. Hubbs starts searching through the compartments of the car saying he thought it was right there...I'm thinking, great, he lost the keys. We were talking and I was saying that we needed to stop at a gas station to get a fake ring out of the vending machine so I could show my friend that he had finally given me a ring. I did find one of the light up rings in the car from one day when we were just playing around and being funny. He then pulls a box out of his pocket and says, why don't you show her this instead? I open the box and inside was the most gorgeous ring I could have ever imagined. I stop breathing for a few long seconds, and then I ask if it was what I thought it was. Hubbs said, "yep, what's your answer?" I said yes. Seven months and one day later we were married. We drove that car on our honeymoon too. Granted, it was a road trip back from where we got married in IL to our apartment in Missouri, but still. That car is a great part of our history together. In fact, when he was on his internship in Northern IL, and I lived in central, I had to get the transmission rebuilt on the jeep I had, so he let me borrow his car for the week my jeep was in the shop. That was while we were dating. And my favorite Valentine's Day ever was when the breaks went out on that car....I think I may have to go out and get a few pictures of the old girl.

Hubbs called in sick today. I think he has a sinus infection. He should be better tomorrow. I hope so. We had plans for the Super Bowl. We were going to go to the party our small group is holding. Supposed to be a ton of fun. That reminds me, I need to go and find my tiny crock pot so I can make my rotel and velveeta dip. Ok, so it isn't my recipe, but I'm the one bringing it.

It is still dark and dreary and it isn't supposed to get sunny again until the end of the week, at the earliest. Oh well. That is what lights are for. I'm shudder thinking of the next electric bill.

Need to go out and get the mail. Looks like a lot from watching the mail lady put it in the box.